Stay-at-home Dads!
Where do we derive our value?
Before I get into the meat of this discussion let me first say. There is significant value in being a Stay-At-Home Dad!
But we as males and much more - Husbands! Have been raised in a society that derives its value from what we do for work.
So, what does it say about us as Men if we don’t have an actual paying job?!
Well, we can look at the lie society tells us, or we can look at the truth of the matter.
Let’s start with the lie.
The lie society tells us is that if we aren’t out providing for our family, we’re worthless, lazy, no good vagrants. Worthy of no respect from our wives or families!
But why is that? Simply put… years of propaganda to get both parents into the workforce. To bring in more taxable income for the bloodthirsty agencies who benefit from such. The truth of the matter as it relates to Stay-at-home Dads is this,
Dads have a unique ability to spend quality time with their kids and build lasting memories with them, which would otherwise be missing.
With that said there are instances where you can work from home and still bring in a paycheck. But you have to tread carefully through those waters.
It’s easy to fall into the category of being a stay-at-home dad while remaining consumed by work.
I know, I was there!
I unconsciously prioritized my work as a freelance writer and podcaster over my wife and kids.
Sure, I would spend time with them and give them time. But, it had reached a point with my youngest, where I would give him about 10 - 15 minutes of playtime, and more often than not, it wasn’t focused and fully engaged time spent with him.
My oldest always wanted to play video games, So, sometimes I would put my youngest off and play with my oldest for an hour or so. Solely, because it didn’t take as much energy. But in hindsight, that was a horrible way to carry myself. I’ve since gotten better. But the problem with working for yourself is that it can often be difficult
to detach yourself from work when you’re “dedicated workspace is also a common space in your home.
Long story short I found myself in a state of “Burnout.”
It was problematic!
And I questioned my value.
Consequently, the house got cleaner, and some aspects of daily life in the house got more attention.
I’m currently wading through healthy practices, ultimately reverting my work from a paid model to a free/hobby level of work.
Which sounds “defeating” but it isn’t, in actuality.
In actuality, It’s a wise move. Especially, as it relates to our income bracket - considering taxes.
I still do what I’m passionate about. But, without some of the stressors that weighed on me.
And I remember to get out from in front of the laptop, to enjoy a walk, as well as other factors when It comes to taking care of myself.
Parting remarks!
Dads are just as valuable as Stay-at-home Parents, In comparison to moms.
Although there is a stigma associated with it still.
Who cares. We’re not trying to impress anybody.
So rock on Stay-at-home Dads!